Dear Counsellor – what do you do to help families?
From Karla:
“Many of us have brains wired up to expect danger at every corner, be triggered easily, imagine rejection where there is none, take things personally, avoid, strike out, self loathe, and so many more. The good news is, the brain can be healed through great therapy sessions. I help clients and families feel better every day. I help families become more safe, more connected and calmer, more present and happier. I love my work and I am super passionate about families.
How are we shaped? We come into the world wired to connect. Beginning in utero and from our first breath, we embark on a quest to feel safe in our bodies, in our environments, and in our relationships with our caregivers. The autonomic nervous system is our personal surveillance system, always on guard, asking the question, “Is it safe?”. Feeling unsupported/unsafe as a child, our nervous system and brain can wire up to become overreactive, hypervigilant, sluggish and other forms of dysregulation. A dysregulated nervous system is an incredibly common experience and often expresses as behavioural issues and disconnection from the people around us.
When our primary caregivers are unable to meet our needs of safety, trust, attunement, love and connection, an insecure attachment is formed. An Anxious attachment can present as an overly fussy child that cannot easily be soothed and an Avoidant child can present as a reclusive child that rarely cries and seems not to need you and plays on their own. Once recognised and understood, we can work towards a more secure attachment.
An intrinsic part of building safety and connection is coming into a secure attachment with others and ourselves. In my work, I help clients to be able to connect with others (and themselves). I help clients start by feeling calmer, more present, enjoying connecting with their breathing, with their body. Learning to be an observer of their thoughts, feelings and reactions – not a slave to them. Sessions bring pleasure, as clients get breakthrough moments that lift a big load off their shoulders, shifting their old negative feelings into positive feelings – feelings like curiosity and relief.
Your family system might not even take much to repair! Families can benefit from one single session!”
Karla Leis
Ph: 0458 888 362
